The understudy


Didn’t sleep so well again last night and am up early thinking about why.  I had a recurring dream this morning, and though I don’t remember much, the gist was that I was being asked to fill in for someone in a play on short notice.  Very short.  Like that day short.  It was set a hundred or so years ago because the costume was My Fair Ladyish, and it had to be ordered online (but arrived within hours, go figure).  About all I remember is that I was nervous (rightfully so, I’ve been in plays before and memorizing lines was tough back then–even harder now!), but somehow I was going to be able to do it.  Perhaps I didn’t have a choice, though I’m thinking I did and that I said yes, obviously.

Somewhat awake, I was pondering the dream when Moody’s quote came back to me, “The world has yet to see what God will do with and for and through and in and by the man who is fully and wholly consecrated to Him.”  So what does fully consecrated look like?  I’m sure there are varying opinions about that, everything from monasteries to mission fields to ministries that involve pouring out one’s life in whatever way God asks, which is scary to most people.  To be honest, it used to be scary to me, too.  In fact, I had the usual misperception when I was younger that saying yes to God meant you’d be sent somewhere in Africa or some other frightening far-off place where you had to learn a new language and rough it for the rest of your life.  I know better now.

At some point the questions began to arise that shouldn’t the One who made you uniquely you with all your likes and dislikes and talents and quirks and your personality know what would make you the happiest, the most fulfilled?  Is it possible that everything in your life happened for a purpose?  And if He loves you so deeply, deeply enough that He’d send His son to die for you so that you could be restored from what you were never meant to be in the first place, wouldn’t He want to see you walking in your destiny?  For the joy set before Him Jesus went to the cross.  That was His destiny.  And we are His joy.  Is He ours?  God has been boxing me in, and though I fought against that for a while I realize now that it’s a good thing.  He is jealous for me, and I bend beneath the weight of His wind and mercy.

Shakespeare said, “All the world’s a stage, and all the men and women merely players.”  We all have a part to play on this world’s stage.  This is where we get to write the stories that will be told throughout eternity.  We get to make a difference, actually be used by God for something bigger than ourselves.  If we “try our utmost to be that man” and keep saying yes even when it’s scary.  And the scary part only lasts as long as it takes for the realization of how much God loves you to dawn on your heart.  Fear can’t stand in the face of love.  Neither can doubt or unbelief for that matter.

I wonder how many people spend their lives rehearsing for a part in a play they were never meant to be in, going through the motions while their heart is someplace else.  God doesn’t want us to be miserable, He wants us to follow our smile, go after what makes our heart sing (after all, He’s the one who put that song there)!  God is love, and He’s looking for those who will be Love with shoes on.  If you know Love, you’ll be ready for whatever part you’re asked to play.


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