Empowered

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Last week I attended the Empowered conference at Global Awakening.  Formerly known as a School of Healing and Impartation, the conference was run much like others I’ve attended, with sessions running from 9 in the morning until 9 at night (although you usually don’t get out of there until 11:00!).  Kevin was originally planning to attend this with me, but he decided to wait until the conference in February.  We had invited a fellow GSSI student to stay with us (saving him approximately four hours of driving a day), and I enjoyed his company as well as the rich conversations, prayers, and impartation he poured into my life.  What a blessing :)

My level of expectation rose during the conference.  As it turned out, I miscounted and my fast didn’t actually end until Thursday!  That was hard on Wednesday when I realized I still had one more day to go because I had already psyched myself up to eating the next day!  But it was all good.  Thursday Randy did impartation but I didn’t go forward.  The instructions are that if you feel the Lord moving (through tears, shaking, etc.) to go forward.  Well, I had the tears, but then I almost always do, and as there was nothing “new” to what I was experiencing, I stayed at my seat.  But an opportunity presented itself to talk to Randy at the end of the evening, so I went up to him, told him I was on the last day of a “40-day slow” (that’s what he calls them) and asked if he’d pray for me, which he did.  He prayed that God would give me what I was asking for and then blessed the fast.  :)

The teaching was excellent.  I’d never heard of Ron Phillips before and I loved his messages!  Rodney Hogue spoke at GSI so some of what he taught was familiar (though it’s always good to hear it again!).  Tom Jones went over some of the same things he did in Brazil, and Randy expounded on church history and healing.  I encouraged my daughter-in-law to subscribe to the live feed, which she did.  She enjoyed Ron Phillips’ message so much on Wednesday that she actually came down that night (evenings are free and open to the public).  It was her first visit to Global and it was so good to have her beside me!  She got to meet Ron and Rodney both as they were leaving and I was so proud of her.  She could have asked them to pray for her but instead she asked if she could pray for them, specifically that they would have a good night’s rest and be refreshed.  The next day Ron said it was the best night’s sleep he’d had in six months :)

On Friday we sat behind the pastor from the midwest who leads the church where they’d just had a similar conference.  I don’t remember his last name but his first name was Steve and his son was there with him.  I believe it was Friday night after worship that I leaned over to him and said “I want some of that!” (He was a happy camper, lol.)  He and his son each took a hand and started to pray for me.  Steve had actually prayed for me earlier in the day and I told him I wasn’t sure I was receiving anything because I rarely felt anything.  He reassured me that I was, that he can tell when something is not being received (don’t ask me how), and I relaxed.  Later the realization came that because I was so focused on what I perceived to be an inability to receive that it had actually become a distraction and probably a hindrance.  We had a good time in prayer, but at some point other people decided they wanted in on the action, and I had my first experience with someone trying to push me over.  Well, he learned that I don’t do courtesy drops, though it was a painful lesson for me.  This guy was pushing so hard my head was bent all the way back.  My neck actually started to hurt and it gave me a headache.  I don’t know why I didn’t think to ask God to have him stop earlier (it must have lasted five minutes or more), because as soon as I prayed that prayer he backed off.  A fellow online student who was sitting beside me (and who is a seer) said there was this “electricity” in a circle around me.  I didn’t feel or sense it, but I know something was going on.  Later that night as I was praying for a man in a wheelchair Steve came up and whispered something to me about what he saw on/over me.  I wish I could see like these people do.  I keep praying for God to open my spiritual eyes and trust that it’s going to happen at some point.  For now I mostly “see” things when I’m in the half-awake-half-asleep.

Saturday Prem prayed for me to be filled with the Spirit and then things started to get interesting.  As I stood there with my eyes closed it felt as if something was shaking in the atmosphere, there were these “vibrations” I was picking up.  Then I felt as if I was in some kind of bubble, as if I was all by myself in that room of 300 people, and there was a wonderful peace.  Didn’t hear anything, but I sure felt it.  He’d prayed during a break, but soon the next session started and I sat down and just sat still with my eyes closed for a long while.  I didn’t want to move from that place, but I did eventually, leaving the session to find a quiet room to be by myself and worship and talk to God.  It was a special time.  But it’s what happened a couple hours later that I will always remember.

Tom Jones gave a message that he gave in Brazil, “How Hungry are You?”  I don’t know if it’s because it was the last day or what, but people were hungreeeee!  At one point early in his message Prem leans over to me and says, “The Lord just walked by.”  I’m like, YES!  Almost immediately his right hand began to move, going in a circular motion.  Then it spread to his left as well.  I’m accustomed to the unusual ways the Spirit moves on him, and so I helped him get his watch off and also held his ring and glasses because you don’t know how wild things may get!  Then Tom said something about hating coming to this part of a message, trying to wind things down, but Randy must have been standing in the back and came up at that point and whispered something to him.  I’m sure he sensed what was going on and so rather than shut down what the Spirit was doing the opportunity was opened up for some “ministry time.”  I don’t remember but I think there may have been some cheers :)  I know I was excited!

So Tom has us stand up and he begins to pray “Come Holy Spirit…” and as he’s praying my hands begin to move.  It felt as if Someone had taken ahold of them and was pulling me.  They went left and kept going left, and I just kind of followed (haltingly at first because I wasn’t sure what in the world was going on, though I didn’t really care).  I heard Prem laugh and if anyone else had their eyes open (they weren’t supposed to but who knows) they may have wondered, “Why is that woman turning in circles?”  They were slow circles but yes, that’s what was happening.  Three times I went around and then He let go and I actually fell into the lady beside me, lol.  Needless to say when the call to come forward for impartation went out I didn’t hesitate to go up!  Tom prayed over me for my destiny to be released and after he was done I went down, right hand shaking as it did when Randy did his first impartation over me in June.  As I laid there I wondered, “God, is this really you?” and made an effort to stop my hand from shaking.  But when I did, the “shakes” hit the rest of my body.  So yeah, it was from Him.  Did I hear anything?  No.  And it doesn’t matter.  I’ll take a touch from God however He wants to give it.  I got to thinking afterward about the whole circle thing.  It felt like a dance, but as I was standing in a row there was nowhere to move.  I wondered where I would have been led if I’d been standing in an aisle or somewhere with more room.  I hope He comes to dance with me again soon :)  The other thought I had was about the circles.  I believe it is significant that Prem’s hands were going in circles (very furiously, I might add).  Well, God made my hands go in circles, too.  I’d been praying for Him to really touch me, for a baptism of fire, that I didn’t care what it looked like and that I wasn’t afraid (though I’m not sure I believe myself on that one :)   But He was ever so gentle with me, and I will never forget the feel of His hands in mine.  Even as I type that my heart aches to feel them again.

In the evening Randy did another healing service.  That’s how each day ended.  The first night there was instruction about words of knowledge and how they worked, so by the last night everyone understood.  When the call went out for those who had them to go forward a quarter of the crowd went up!  People were getting healed every night (not everyone, but a lot), and when it was over Randy said if anyone wanted prayer for healing to raise their hands and someone on the ministry team would pray for them.  Students are on the ministry team, so I turned around to see if anyone wanted prayer and directly behind me stood John.  I have to confess that my heart sank.  John has been blind for two years, has a problem with diabetes, neuropathy in his feet, and something with the myelin sheath on his nerves.  I asked him, “Didn’t Randy pray for you last night?”  He just smiled and said yeah.  Well, I didn’t have much faith, but it’s not my job to heal, just to pray.  The healing is up to God and I just need to be obedient.  I wish I could report to you that God healed him, but if He did it happened later.  Another couple had come up and wanted to pray for him as well, so they went first.  Then I prayed, and afterward I had the thought, “Kiss his eyes.”  Of course I wondered, God was that you or was that me?  In the end I decided it didn’t matter and asked John if it was okay if I kissed his eyes.  He said yes.  There were tears in them.  No, he wasn’t healed.  He asked us to pray for him whenever we thought of him, and I will.  I gave his wife a hug and prayed for her too.  So there was no miracle, but they were loved, and love never fails.

Last night Kevin and I went to church.  It wasn’t the usual Sunday night meeting as we were there to discuss some church business.  Not many showed up, but there was a new couple who came.  I saw the pastor speaking to them in the lobby, I’m sure telling them that this wasn’t the normal evening service, but they came in and joined us anyway.  Afterward pastor said they’d come because she needed prayer.  Evidently she’d had cancer in the past and it had come back.  I thought, wow God, you’re not wasting any time!  Pastor got some oil and as my husband’s an elder he asked him to come up.  He also asked me to, and before I went I asked to say a few words.  I don’t remember exactly what I said but I did mention that I’d just come from a four-day conference on healing and talked about that a little.  So I went and sat beside her, held her hand and put my other one on her back.  Pastor prayed first, then my husband, then I prayed, cursing the cancer and commanding it to die in Jesus’ name and breaking off its assignment against her.  I’m quite certain most people there never heard a prayer like that before :)

When we were done she looked over at me and said, “You’re the first woman to touch me in church.”  How sad in that?   I thought I saw sheep bites on her when she came in.  So many people have been wounded by other Christians.  Then she went on to tell me about a pain she had in her abdomen, saying, “I have an alien in me.”  Six months ago that would have scared the bejeezies out of me, but I said, “Let’s pray” and commanded the pain to go in Jesus’ name.  Then I asked her how she felt, if it was better or had moved.  She said it had moved.  Ha!  I thought of Randy’s line, “If you spot ’em, you got ’em!”  It’s a spirit of affliction, and I commanded it to go and she felt better.  But here’s the interesting part.  As we’re walking out of the church Kevin says to me, “As we were sitting there and Pastor started talking about her need for prayer I got this intense pain in my abdomen.”  God gave him a word of knowledge!  I’ve been praying for God to give me words of knowledge like that and Kevin isn’t even asking and gets them, lol.  Needless to say, he’s looking forward to attending the next conference and learning more.

I don’t know if I shared how the last week of my fast Julie Meyer’s song “So Pants My Soul” became my heart’s cry, and it still is.  When can I go and meet with God, and meet with God?  Right now sounds good….  :)

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