It’s Halloween, and New Bloomfield has been invaded by an army of children looking for goodies, but I’m upstairs in the den, the lights are off (except for a small desk lamp), and yet someone still knocked! I usually spent $20-40 in candy and run out in about a half hour. This year I didn’t even do that. Sorry kiddos, but there’s no money in the budget for treats this year!
It’s been a while since I’ve written and a lot has happened. Suffice it to say I’m spending less time online and have been quite busy, although that’s a poor excuse. Voice of the Apostles was last weekend. Three GSI classmates and I stayed with a friend in Lancaster and had a great time, although I was working through a few things and I think that hindered my ability to take full advantage of the conference. Not surprising though. It felt a lot like Brazil in some ways except that no one I prayed for (to my knowledge) received any instant healing or answers (they weren’t all healing prayers), although there was a woman named Violet who needed a creative miracle in her left ear. She’d lost her eardrum due to infection years back. Another team member and I prayed for her and at one point I got the chorus of a song in my head, so figuring it was the Holy Spirit who put it there I sang it, silly as it may have sounded. It was “Create in Me a Clean Heart” except the lyrics were “Create in her a new ear, O God, and create a new eardrum in her ear!” :))) She didn’t get her new eardrum, but who’s to say the next time she sings that song in church she won’t?! She was a delightful woman and loved the song, btw, and we all laughed and celebrated being “Dad’s kids” while we prayed together.
As in Brazil, when I left after it was over there was breakthrough (what’s with that anyway?). The woman we were staying with had gone to church, the other ladies had left early in the morning, and Prem and I had a chance to talk before we both took off. It was very encouraging and my own level of expectation and hope rose significantly. I’ve really come to appreciate Prem and his “Holy Spirit amens”, lol. Then I got in my car and restarted a Graham Cooke CD I’d been listening to, and it was exactly what I needed to hear. I arrived at church late and by then was flying pretty high. They were singing worship songs before communion and I walked in the back. When I saw my husband (whom I hadn’t seen for a week) and also my kids who were there (they don’t usually come to our church), I was filled with so much joy I thought I was gonna ‘splode, lol. After communion, a man in our church shared that God healed his arm which he’d injured two weeks before during the worship! I don’t know who was encouraged more :)
I’ve been pressing in to know Him and have come to realize a couple of things. First, there is always opposition when you do that. I wasn’t quite ready for what came, perhaps because you don’t think persecution will come from friends and/or Christians, but come it did, and it threw me for a loop. But I’m back on track and a little wiser for the wear. The other thing I realized just yesterday is that though I want to have an encounter with God, it actually scares me. I’ve witnessed other people’s encounters, you see, and they don’t exactly look like something enjoyable :) But I know God loves me. And I know He is good. So I’m going to keep asking.
This morning I awoke at 4:44 a.m. I often wake through the night, but when I awaken as suddenly as I did I take note of the time, and this time it seemed significant. Also, a song was playing in my head, Jesus Culture’s “I Want to Know You.” So I went over to the upper room and pulled out my iPod and listened to it, prayed, and went back to bed. This evening I had a long chat with a friend and I told her about waking up at 4:44. I decided to Google it and watched a video that said 444 is the number for Damascas. All righty then. It was after I hung up that I realized that’s where Paul was headed when he met Jesus! He was on the road to Damascus and had a “suddenly” encounter of his own. So I’m encouraged. I think I’m on the right road :)
Trisha Frost is teaching the next three days, and I’m really looking forward to it. When she taught at GSI I think I was in denial regarding my own orphan spirit/heart. In fact, it was at VOA that I finally owned up to it. I forgot to mention that I talked to Todd White there and told him that I was dealing with orphan heart issues. He basically said they can’t be prayed away, something I pretty much knew, but the two scriptures he gave were the ones God gave me, the first being “I will not leave you as orphans, I will come to you,” and the second, “It’s better for you if I go.” That last one is the one the “visitor” to my church said this summer that made my heart leap. And every time I think of that I kick myself for not grabbing his arm and saying, “I won’t let you go until you bless me!” :)
Gotta go! Kev’s home. More later…or whenever!